I'd been looking forward to this weekend all summer, and to be honest it was a hair of a letdown. Don't get me wrong 'twas good times and revelry, but I wanted Sodom AND Gomorrah. And I only got Gomorrah. Unlike the NC-17/Tony Scott tales of yesteryear, there were no rooftop S.W.A.T. teams, no Hells Angels/Mongols brawl and no lessy park bench cunnilingus. I did however hookup with a cute girl sporting a two-tone dye job. I’m not sure if this oil & vinegar half blonde/half brunette look is mainly a Nevada fad or if it’s gone airborne, but it's downright trendy in these parts. As a side note the two-tone girl delivered the best pre-felatio, self-depreciating line I’ve ever heard. “I have to warn you... I’m not the best in the west at this”. Somewhere Woody Allen got his wings.
The most striking woman I saw was a CG-enhanced Spartan straight out of “300”. She had Gina Gershon’s face, Mickey Rourke’s body, Posh's over the muscle implants and long tangled stout Amazonian hair. Sounds odd I know, but I swear everyone in town was gunning for her. It takes mad game to bring down SPARTA!